How many more nights till . . .

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

I'm happy being surrounded by natto! Yaaaay!
*chuckles to myself*

(Don't ask me if I can eat up all of them until the expiry date)

Well, time flies really fast as it's only 2 days to go until the first day of the tour!
I wonder what the first day will be like! *gets excited**heart skips a beat**feels nervous*

I did a rehearsal at Makuhari Messe last Friday, and then and not till then did I stand on the stage there. Over the past month I've done rehearsals in the rehearsal studio looking at me and my band in the mirror, but things are different when you're on the stage! It feels different, I mean! I dressed in costume too. I did the show in front of only five or so of the audience.

And the next day, I did a public rehearsal in front of a venueful of the audience. That's what you call GeneralProbe. I did it as a real show.

I was surprised to find a lot of related articles the next morning, as I thought the audience was of the record company people and their family members only. So media people were there too! I didn't know that . . . Good I could pull it off . . .

There were a lot of audience members who weren't a fan of me at all, and they were industry insiders too, so at first the audience was kinda cool and stiff in the tension-filled "public rehearsal," but you know, I just didn't care about it! (lol) I, who've had the chance to sing in front of a lot of people in ages, instantly entered the mode of "Alright I'm gonna give it my best shot! Just sit by and watch me you smugs~)

They were all cooking at the end, which made me very happy. They were all like, the audience of the real normal live show~!
You can tell them how you feel if you put your mind to it, huh
Hehe.

Also I was happy to find lots of kids there! That's part of what's good about GeneralProbe.

I got to know problems and things to be improved, so I learned a lot from the show!
The day one is coming up! I'll do my best, day by day

The 5th time score!

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

I got 14825073.
I got all the way to this score the fifth time I played the endless marathon mode, but the game was over the moment I felt abandoned and thought "Oh, no, I've had enough of it!!" (lol) I'm embarrassed to have shown you those two scores in my newbie-player era here~!


From around the LEVEL 200 the sensory speed becomes consistent, so I think it really boils down to a matter of "motivation" . . . You could play it forever with some pauses in between to drink water, stretch, go to the toilet and refresh your head, I guess.

I kinda don't see any point in going for the higher records, but I may give it a try expecting some surprises, as a Tetris maniac . . .

Shoot!

I forgot to take a detail photo of that pretty cool record!!

The number of LINE went up to 999 and couldn't go any higher; I remember the LEVEL was 200 something. I think it was higher than 220. Aww I can't remember!

I don't play Tetris any more today . . .

Got 8229968-!!

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

Geez!!!

I tried the game again, just casually thinking "Let's do it again," and then it just wouldn't end!!! It wouldn't end and I was almost saying "That's enough"!

My knuckles and elbows started to ache; my eyes tired: I even thought of blowing the game up to end it.

But maybe I could hardly reach this good record again . . . so this time I definitely wanted to score as high as possible!!! - I was fired up, determined to push myself as much as possible, and kept going.

It ended just now so I looked at the time - 9 pm??? No kidding!

Just how many hours did this play last?!

I think this is a pretty cool record but also wonder how high score others can get?

My aim is to score 9999999! Ghehe

Maybe it's about time to try the Worldwide match-making option . . .
*grins*

Details of 767004

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

Alright I'll give myself a crash course in this!

My latest Tetris DS score (Endless Mode)

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

I Tetris-ed with all my might, turning the Endless Mode setting on!

1st time score:

767004

That's it!

CONGRATULATIONS!!

Um, would you remember, that I had talked so happily about the joy of having got Tetris DS last month . . .

Actually I haven't played it yet till now, as I've been running around with my head cut off because of TV or rehearsals or stuff like that and hardly felt like concentrating on the game alone.

D, Do you really love Tetris~~~~~~~

That doesn't surprise me. How rude could I ever be.

Today I'm off, so I'm just being lazy
I thought "Oh, Tetris! Let's do it!" just now, and I finally played Tetris DS!! for the first time!!

As I thought I wouldn't get used to playing with this new model for a short while, I started the standard, marathon mode one from the level 3

*pip pip* *flash* *bump* *tralalala* *flash*

Hm-hum . . . the key touch is light, I can control the pieces fairly well . . . Huh?? So I can see the "NEXT" pieces this much?? That makes me figure out pieces that come far ahead . . . Oh, huh? What's this box named "HOLD" on the left? Ah! Aha! So I can do such a thing?? Is that really fair?? Is that really okay to do? Wooow, I'm in my groove now, things are startin' to heat up here! When the level gets higher and higher, the piece dropped affects the next one a little bit . . . Alright!!! Go for Tetris at this speed! Here goes! Go for it!! Take that!!!

:fanfare:

Huh? The screen is stopped?


"CONGRATULATIONS!!"


Oh, eh?

EEEK! H, Here comes the credits---!

. . . So my play on the standard/marathon mode was over that way, all of a sudden. Seems like I completed the max number of lines to erase.

I checked the menu screen in detail and just found the function to set the mode to Endless! I didn't notice it last time! *squeaks* How frustrating-!

I scored 384916 on the game I just completed, so maybe I could score 400000 at least if I tried more on Endless Mode! Alright let's give it a try!

That's all of my brand-new report on my first-time Tetris DS experience

My addiction

I'm glad my appearance on Top Runner was received well~!

I was secretly worried about what if it was unfavorably received, as I've never talked that frankly on TV before. When I try to talk, show more of myself than usual, I'd have to be cautious because it's pretty hard to decide how much I should show of myself, but my talk paid off after all~!

I don't check the TV shows I'm on very often but I may ask and get a copy of this one from the staff to take a look.

Now. You know there are many kinds of addictions in this world, and here let me show you the one that I'm clearly aware of

That's "makura(pillow) addiction."

Do you guys like pillows? I bet you do, right?! I am a pillow lover myself, who answered "Pillow-san!!" in the past when I was asked what I would bring if I woke up at midnight and found my house was on fire!

I even hold the pillow all day long sometimes when I'm mentally stressed out. If I let go of the pillow for a while to do something, I immediately start to feel something creepy around my mouth being like "Aww . . . I can't take it! I give up!" and bury my face into the pillow again.

I always feel heavenly comfort when I feel the pillow to my face. Especially to my lips and around my mouth! For me "Pillows" are something that embody "Mercy."

But at the same time, when I feel the pillow to my face, a violent emotion sweeps all over me and I clamp my teeth together, then clutch the pillow with all the might in my body. Shaking like an angry cat crying "FFFT! FFFT! FfnguahhH!" I get really excited. Only for a moment, though.

Do you guys get it? Do you know what that is?

"Oh, yeah yeah! Same here!" - if you're one of them please email me! Come on!!!

Hello

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

I'm Kuma Chang.

Hikaru-chan looks kinda tired, because Hikaru-chan sings a lot lately.

So today me say hello to you all in place of Hikaru-chan.

This is my staff pass hehehe.

The tag on my bottom reads made in china, so Hikaru-chan named me "Chang, Kuma."

That's why me is Kuma Chang. Me is always called by my full name.

Awww Me is getting sleepy. Me is off to sleep now. Good night.

:mumble mumble:

Got the No.1 position!!

In being quick at running away, I mean(lol)

You know when you go on M-ste, the show staff people line up at the exit of the TV station and send you off after the show! They take a box of M-ste tissues (very popular souvenir, as you'd know!) from a pile on the table and hand it to you with the words "It was a good performance!"~.

It seems like I always run off the TV show or shooting sets(which I thought myself it was just normal), and yesterday like any other day, right after the show was over and I returned the dressing room, I put on my plain clothes, took my bag, checked if I left anything and went straight out of the room - hearing stylist-san saying "Huh?! You're so quick!!" in surprise at the back.

Then I went down in the TV station's elevator, and when I came to the auto door at the exit! Some staff who were preparing the tissues panicked at the sight of me! "Oh, er, the others are not here yet . . . !!" With those words they gave me a M-ste tissue box apologetically.

No wonder. Because it was 2 minutes past 9pm. I, one of the performers, came out first before any main production staff people, so that's why they were surprised . . .

I've never been that quick before! Now I realized I run off to home very quickly. (lol)

Being good at scissors skills and quick at running away have been what I could only be proud of from my childhood, and it seems I'm still quick at running away at the age of 23

It felt like I came first in a race . . . !
Or like I became Kaze no Matasaburou (Matasaburou the Wind Boy) . . . !
I came home feeling great, humming.
High five!

Today is M-ste day!

Maybe it was because I co-starred with Hamasaki Ayumi san, but last time the staff around us (especially the TV-show staff!) were giving off some strange air of strained tension, which made Hamasaki san and me laugh together; I wonder if things will get back to normal today~?

I'm going now!

The Utadas' table

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

I've worked out an amazing trick! ! !

I thought I gotta tell you guys about this so lemme tell you right off the bat!

I love natto-maki(fermented soybean roll) so I often buy it at convenience stores and eat it in the rehearsal studio. I don't know why but I just can't help loving natto-maki(suki de suki de dou shiyou mo nai).

I think maybe I like to sense the difference between grains of natto and of rice in my mouth. Natto grains are one size larger and slimily slippery; rice grains are 40% smaller than natto grains and not slippery but kinda sticky in the mouth. Those interchange things are what I love the most about it. And on top of that comes crispy nori(laver seaweed) outside. Nori also sticks in the mouth sometimes . . . Oops, I've talked too long about my love for natto-maki.

But! you know what, when I talk with natto-maki lovers, they all say . . . there's this danger that some grains of natto drip down from the bottom when you eat the very last part!

Yes, it looks exactly like the case of chocolate cornet(or of soft serve ice cream under the scorching sun). I always feel nervous toward the end for fear of spilling natto from the bottom! That makes me hardly able to eat my fill of natto-maki! So I tend to cram my mouth with about two mouthfuls of it at the last bite.

Now with this trick you can say bye-bye to those worries! Today around half past 6 pm, I found out the way to eat natto-maki with much more pleasure and comfiness!

I tore off some of rolled nori at the bottom of doubled-over part and put it at the bottom face of natto-maki, just like putting a lid! Like shown in the photo above! !

Isn't it amazing? Isn't it incredible?? (Am I too excited?) (I was so excited that I took a bunch of photos of it actually)

Time to say goodbye to those days where I had to eat it worrying natto might spill! Though today the difficulty of my own made songs dented me slightly, I enjoyed natto-maki at my own pace unconstrained, thanks to this big revolution! I couldn't be happier!

Please give it a try, when you eat natto-maki next time

Oh yes more important than that, my album is out now. Guys who've got a copy of it already, thank you very much---! !

I love ikura and uni

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

Hey hey look at this!
Today I worked on it this hard again!

I colored ikura(salmon caviar) and uni(sea urchin). I think I did a pretty good job! Well done!

Of course I'm working on singing hard as well! Yes I am!

On the 13th morning I promised on the radio that I would upload here a photo of me in pajamas, but I couldn't make it~. I wonder what is the best way to take a full-length photo of me, as I sorta prefer not to see me against my room background. Hmmm.
Oh yeah, come to think of it! I was in pajamas in the "peace sign of joy" photo I uploaded the other day! ! (it was dark though . . . lol)

I'm embarrassed to be seen in pajamas, after all.


Good night

1, 1PM?!

Oh noes-! I overslept!

All day today

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

Phhew~!

Worked hard all day today!

This is the picture I drew with all my heart and soul, driving a sign pen between rehearsals ! !
I put my soul into every single pearl ! ! Just like putting my soul into every single sound when singing . . . !
I would've drawn more if I had had time~. Ah yes, why don't I pick up tomorrow where I left off ?

For your information, the thing peeping out a little from the upper right: it's a picture of uni(sea urchin).

I have no idea what I'm doing . . .
I'm like a poor kid who draws pictures dreaming of those fine but unaffordable foods . . .

By the way I went to work in a miniskirt and black pumps today, to fire myself up.

It's been so so so long since I last wore a skirt that I felt kinda embarrassed, to tell the truth. Gotta get used to moving around and singing in skirts, heels and stuff very soon ! ! ! Everyone seemed a little surprised to see me, as I'd always been in some random sneakers and parkas until last week.

The rehearsal is starting to heat up.


********************
(NOTE by Nuuk)
hiragana at the upper left of the picture reads "ikura," salmon caviar.

Do you like a two-faced girl?

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

It's my Tour Staff Pass

Don't tell me people should know Hikki by sight

Funeral for unused Lyrics-chan

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

I talked about this before in Keep Tryin' blog, but I always carry a notebook as the production note/diary/doodle book with me, and heaps of notebooks have piled up over the past 10 years, from when I started songwriting at age 12 or 13 up until today! I have no idea of the exact numbers unless I count them, but it would be around 25 or so I guess?

The old ones are stored together with some precious goods, but I still have the one I was using last year at hand. I happened to read it over again a little while ago, which deeply touched my heart. My own words from last year made me think a lot.

And you know ! I found something very familiar to me ! !

That's a part of lyrics unused in the song called Passion ! ! !

At first I didn't realize myself for a moment what it was and reread it several times thinking "Shizuka na tabibito? Huh? What's this?"

I remember I had a very hard time both writing lyrics and making music of Passion . . . The photo above, is the evidence of my struggle. Like this I went through trial and error over and over again.

Now here, let me show you that unused Lyrics-chan! They ended up changed to "Natsukashii iro ni~" and "Nido to aenu~." The melody was completely different as well at that time when I wrote this.


Shizuka na tabibito no utau uta niha

Mada kotoba ga nai
(the song sung by a quiet traveler has no words yet)

Hisoyaka na jounetsu ga itsumo

Zidai wo ugokasu
(a secret passion is the one that makes time move)


May you rest in peace

*rings a knell*

Sub: Re: Takagi Bu-

If you need the information taught previously by your friend by email.

You'd probably skim through your past saved emails to find that email, wouldn't you?

That's why I was browsing the subjects of the emails sent/received in the middle of last month, and I found some with very interesting subject.

That's "Sub: Re: Takagi Bu-"

Why the last part is "Bu(Kanji)-," not "Bu(Katakana)-"? Why in the first place there is this history of more than 10 emails sent/received with this subject, which is supposed to have something to do with Takagi Bu san?? What were the contents of them that made us so excited?

I was curious about the contents that I completely forgot myself, so I read the last two of these mysterious sent/received emails.

Email from my friend to me, and my reply to it:

Time: 5/12 00:21
From: ##***
Sub: Re: Takagi Bu-
-------------------------------------
Johnny Bu- Good



Time: 5/12 00:22
To: ##***
Sub: Re: Takagi Bu-
-------------------------------------
The

Bu-tles




. . . What the heck is this

And it just ends here . . .

For what am I paying my packet communication charge . . . ?

On top of that, I completely forgot what I was looking for ! Wahahahaha ! !


Th, this is mysterious ! I'm off to bed now !

We started the rehearsal

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

Today is the day 3 of the rehearsal !

Have you seen those rehearsal photos on the blog yet?

Today this person - nah, "this bear," the shadow producer of UTADA UNITED, is on the road to the rehearsal studio to check the progress and show his face.

"Hikaru-chaan . . . Are we there yet? . . . Me is getting sick a little"

Got a sample CD-!

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

'I got a sample CD of my new album! I don't need it so I'll give it to you my Kuma Chang!'

"Thank you Hikaru-chan this is hard isn't it"

'Yeah, the plastic is hard. But the inside is stuffed full of various kinds of textured sounds! Melting sounds, waterish sounds, edgy sounds, slimy sounds, jingling sounds, warm sounds, chilly sounds . . . '

"Mmm. Me is soft and stuffed full of soft cotton hehe"

'I'm soft too, not that soft like you my Kuma Chang, though It seems like most of my body is made of water.'

"Made of many things our world is"

'Sure it is.'

Today I taped Top*Runner

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)

I got very tense, talked a lot, admired Honjou Manami san a lot and got tired so much-!

The photo is of the shoes used as part of costumes today, though it's black and hard to see! They're so cute that I've sneaked them outNo not true, I've bought them.

What I murmured at backstage right before the taping of the talk part was:

"Ahh~. Today after the taping I wanna go back home, eat something, and go to bed . . . "

"That's just pretty normal!" the makeup staff san and stylist san pointed out immediately.

Oh yeah, true! Somehow I put myself out to voice my hope, which kinda went without saying and was natural for living things. I'm like being true to myself lately

Anyway, you get very much tired after you talk desperately about something, don't you ! !

I think it could be sorta fun, as I've never talked that long on TV before. It was like talking in an interview for a magazine.

In the meeting before the show, the production staff told me "Including some specific episodes could make the show more interesting and easy to understand for the viewers," so I went into the taping thinking "Alright! Some specific episodes! I'll do my best to include them!" . . .

I got nervous by the mysterious mood of the show and kept talking about episodes of Dragon Ball and Neon Genesis Evangelion . . . Hmm, huh?

I described them indeed in detail but I guess that wasn't what the production staff meant . . .
Or rather should I say that wasn't how it was supposed to be . . .
Pon pon . . .


Good night

A new Shito

(a photo is uploaded. please check her official site)
This

This one. This mouse. This looks to me like a Shito . . .


Shito ni miete doushiyou mo na~i
Sore to kore to wa kankei na~i
Shito ni mietedo

You, dork
You just shattered the image of SAKURA Drops!

Hehe.

Say, the other day I was interviewed for the Eva special issue by Weekly Playboy Magazine san, who heard I was a huge Eva fan, and someone who found the name of Weekly Playboy Magazine in the list of scheduled-to-publish magazines featuring my interview emailed me asking "Hikaru-san, er, are you gonna strip off for it?" . . .

No way ! !

. . . A magazine, featuring more embarrassing gravure pictures and interview of me in a sense, is to be issued this month. I can't get near to magazines section in convenience stores, by thought of that magazine lining the shelves . . .



:peep:


Guess which magazine that is

A new mystery

When I'm in the car I always leave the roof window open, as long as it doesn't rain too hard.
I don't mind light rain and just keep the window open.

It's because I love wind so much

It's getting warmer lately, with a very nice breeze - something happened just when I was thinking like that . . .

It happened while passing below the highway.

*SPLAT*

Eek! That's cold! Is that rain??
No, it's fine and sunny outside, right?


. . . Holy crap, a mystery liquid stuck to my arm and cheek ! ! !


E,

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek ! ! ! !

Ew, what is that?! What the heck is that ?!
Hey me, wait a minute! Do I really want to know what it is?! Can my heart stand the cruel fact? There's a saying, "Ignorance is bliss"! I better wipe it off with tissue and calm down first ! !

. . . *wipes it off*

After that I just tried not to think about anything till I got to the studio, trying to empty my mind.
I kept it to myself up until today, but I took this opportunity to pour out floods of my heart, because I felt like my wound would never heal if nothing was done.

Could be some sort of droplet, I guess. Ha ha ha. You know, like something from the car air-conditioner and stuff . . .

Well, this doesn't hurt at all actually, considering the psychological damage I suffered when a dove's dropping hit my head in my junior high school days ! ! I don't care beans about a mystery liquid ! Hehehe

Now that I think about it, the shock of dove's dropping was tremendous . . . I ran all the way home crying, then washed my head . . .

Haha . . . that could be the strongest thing I remember about my junior high days.

"I would like to go ahead, remembering the 'bitter memories to forget' and taking them as an important milestone to return to somewhere someday." (excerpt from Message from Utada Hikaru/Utada 6.1)

Have a nice evening!
(I've had it with "Have a good night"*smile*)

June is already here!!

There is this woman who wrote an email to me crying, after having read "Mr. Positive of the day" of the other day.

She is an university student now, but it seems like that message carried her back to her rouninsei days. She wrote me that it was a hard time for her, because there was nothing she could put in the occupation column, which made her feel like there was "no her;" and she was always crying in her bed filled with fear, because she had been doing nothing but studying everyday at that time.

Though I myself don't have experience being a rouninsei, I also had days when I cried every night snuggling up in bed, or just held on to the pillow from morning till night feeling like I was melting into the darkness, fading, and seeing the same thing no matter if my eyes were open or not, and maybe, everyone would have had those sort of days!

Pleasant memories are to be treasured indeed, but I have a feeling it is the bitter experiences that have made me what I am now, holding up the shape of me.

I wonder why I feel that way. It might be because I can't find "individual" in "pleasure." A very pleasant memory is mostly shared with someone else, all almost alike, and I feel like your pleasant memories and mine are not so different from each other, but I think my painful memories are only my own.

So those memories are very precious for me!

Even if we all may be feeling similar sadness or loneliness, the bitterness of it will remain "each one's own" forever, I believe.

Something that we learn or protect at those times, could be the most precious point in our lives.

I would like to go ahead in this wilderness with occasional snowcapped mountains with occasional quiet sunsets with occasional storms, remembering the "bitter memories to forget" and taking them as an important milestone to return to somewhere someday!

If you could appreciate those memories, then that would mean you are heading down the right path, wouldn't it.

It would be nice if a year as a rouninsei wouldn't just be a bad memory full of pain for her who gave me an email, when she looked back!

Alright time to go work now!


********************
(NOTE by Nuuk)
"rouninsei" ... a senior high school graduate who is preparing for another chance to enter an university or college.